Apparently I’m the Adult

Growing up, I was going to be a teacher.

Then I was going to be a nurse.

That dream ended somewhere around the realization that I hate hospitals, I didn’t want to clean someone else’s ass, and not a big fan of bodily fluids, which feels like a fairly significant obstacle to a career in nursing.

Then I wanted to be a news reporter.

Also a solid choice for someone who hates public speaking.

Clearly, career planning was going extremely well.

I got married at 18, and because my ex was in the military, my early adult life involved a lot of moving – and a lot of starting over.

So instead of going to college, choosing a career, and following some perfectly planned path up the corporate ladder, I worked wherever life happened to take me.

I worked in banking.

I worked at a daycare.

I worked at a school.

I worked in retail.

Every time we moved, it meant finding another job and figuring out what came next

There was no five-year plan.

There was definitely no vision board.

I was just living my life, working, learning, and trying to figure out what the hell I was supposed to be when I grew up.

Fast-forward more than 20 years and somehow I’m now a Director of People & Operations with an MBA.

Which sounds very impressive when I type it like that.

Meanwhile, there are still days when someone asks me a question at work and part of my brain is like:

Why are you asking ME? Where is the adult in charge?

Oh.

Right.

Apparently it’s me.

My Career Path Was More of a ZigZag.

For a long time, I think I assumed successful people had these perfectly planned careers.

They knew what they wanted to do.

They went to school for it.

They got the job.

They climbed the corporate ladder.

Meanwhile, my resume probably looked like I was throwing darts at a board.

Banking.

Daycare.

School.

Retail.

Eventually, HR and Operations.

But looking back now, I don’t think any of those jobs were actually wasted time.

Working in completely different environments taught me how to deal with different kinds of people.

It taught me how to adapt.

How to communicate.

How to solve problems.

How to walk into a completely new situation and figure it out.

And because moving meant starting over more than once, I got pretty good at that too.

I just didn’t realize at the time that figuring it out was becoming one of my biggest strengths.

Somewhere Along the Way, I Found My Thing

I didn’t grow up dreaming about working in Human Resources.

I’m pretty sure not little girl is sitting in elementary school thinking:

One day I hope I get to write employee policies and have uncomfortable conversations for a living.

😂

But somehow, I found my way into work that actually made sense for me.

People.

Problems.

Organization.

Operations.

Making things work better.

Being the person behind the scenes making sure approximately 700 things don’t fall apart at the same time.

Turns out, I’m pretty good at that.

And little by little, the jobs stopped feeling like jobs I happened to have and started becoming an actual career.

Then I Decided Going Back to School Was a Good Idea

And apparently building a career while raising a kid wasn’t enough for me.

At some point I decided:

You know what I need? Homework.

So I went back to school as an adult.

I earned my bachelor’s degree.

And then, because apparently I didn’t learn my lesson the first time, I kept going and earned my MBA.

Goin to school as an adult is a very specific form of chaos.

You’re not just a student.

You’re working.

You’re a parent.

You’re running a household.

You’re paying bills.

You’re dealing with everything else life throws at you.

And then at the end of the day, when you’d really like to sit on the couch and do absolutely nothing, you remember:

Oh good. I have to study.

There were nights I was exhausted.

There were classes that made me question every life decision that led me there.

There were absolutely moments when I wanted to throw my laptop out the window.

But I kept going.

And when I finally earned my MBA, it meant more because I knew exactly what it took to get there.

Somewhere Along the Way, People Stated Asking ME What to Do

This might be the weirdest part of building a career.

One day, you’re the person asking all the questions.

Then suddenly…

you’re the person everyone is asking.

Excuse me?

When exactly did that happen?

Nobody sends you a notification saying:

Congratulations! You are now officially qualified to be the adult in the room.

People just start coming to you.

They need an answer.

They need a decision.

They need advice.

They need something fixed.

And somehow you’re supposed to know what to do.

I’ve learned that leadership isn’t actually about knowing everything.

It’s about being willing to figure things out.

Sometimes its listening.

Sometimes it’s making decisions nobody loves.

Sometimes it’s having an uncomfortable conversation.

Sometimes it’s admitting you got something wrong.

Sometimes it’s standing up for someone.

And sometimes it’s closing your office door afterward and thinking:

What the hell just happened?

My Definition of Success Has Changed

I’m still ambitious.

Probably annoyingly so.

I still want to grow.

I want to make more money.

I want to accomplish more.

I want to see what I’m capable of.

But success looks different to me now than it probably would have when I was younger.

I don’t want a career that becomes my entire identity.

I don’t want to work myself into the ground just so I can say I’m successful.

I want the career.

But I also want a life.

I want time with my son, my family, my friends, and of course my dogs.

I want to work hard and be proud of what I do – and then actually go live my life.

Apparently There Was A Plan After All

If you had told the 18-year-old version of me that one day she’d be a Director with an MBA, I don’t think she would have believed you.

Mostly because she was apparently still deciding between teaching, nursing, and becoming the next Barbara Walters.

And yet… here we are.

My career didn’t happen in a straight line.

Not even close.

There were moves.

Different jobs.

Starting over.

Raising a child.

Going back to school.

Taking opportunities.

Making many mistakes.

Learning things the hard way.

And a whole lot of figuring it out as I went.

But maybe that’s the part I appreciate most now.

There wasn’t one big decision that go me here.

It was a hundred little ones.

Every job taught me something.

Every restart made me a little more adaptable.

Every challenge made me better at handling the next one.

And somewhere along the way, without even realizing it, I built a career I’m really proud of.

Apparently I didn’t need to know exactly what I wanted to be when I grew up.

I just needed to keep going.

Although for the record, becoming a nurse would have been a terrible idea.

I really do hate hospitals. 😂